I never cease to be amazed by the turnaround time men have when it comes to me. Let me preface this by saying that in the last three years or so I have worked really hard to be less of a jerk when it comes to dealing with guys. Not that I always succeed, but at least I try. (We’re talking about guys I actually date, not the ones I rip on for some genuinely funny things that happen. Or when they’re a total jerk first, because frankly it’d be foolish for me not to capitalize on that for entries to post here.)
Case in point: around the time I was 20 or 21 I had a sweet fluffy faux hawk that brought all the bros to my yard. There’s one in particular I feel like mentioning though, because overall he was a pretty nice dude. I just… flaked on him. I think it had more to do with the fact that the group friends I had at the time told me there was no way some tall, blond Brosef was into me for anything other than shock value. Personally I thought he liked me for my sick tattz and my ability to hold a conversation—regardless, I just quit calling him back after a few weeks of us hanging out on a pretty regular basis.
Shitty, right? Right. I mean, I hate when that shit happens to me. That’s why generally I try to tell dudes if I’m not feeling it. At least then they won’t wonder why after seeing each other on a semi-regular basis I’ve suddenly dropped off the face of the planet.
Anyway, about two months after I initially blew this guy off and had started seeing someone else I ran into him out at a bar. I was in the middle of my shift; my then-boyfriend was standing about five feet away watching as the aforementioned Brosef started asking where I’d been and if everything was okay. I panicked, so I did the only reasonable thing I could think of: I ducked out the back door and booked it out of there for the night. Super responsible way of handling an awkward situation, I know.
Fast-forward four years… I guess without the fauxhawk I’m not nearly as recognizable, but I haven’t ever been the type of girl to forget a face. Brosef approached me at a favored cafe & mentioned I looked familiar but couldn’t put a finger on where we’d met before. Being the awkward little bird that I am, I opted for the best reply (the honest one) and reminded him that I’d blown him off years before.
Why he thought that meant to sit down with me to catch up is beyond me–I’m still not feeling it. He still strikes me as a nice dude, and the little iPhone photo slideshow I got to look over of his adventures in foreign countries was inspiring in a weird way.
I think he got that I’m not interested in a round two from my quick goodbye… or maybe it was the way my waiter mean-mugged him from the time he sat down until I headed out the door. But the guy picked up my tab (nothing serious, just $1.37 for that cup of coffee) and said he’d like to hang out and talk again. I’m glad I got to apologize for blowing him off without feeling like I had to do anything else… I’m not big on that whole “make it up to me” mentality.